Butterflies, fly away…

Caring, anxious heart, why are you afraid?

Mind drifting, seeking the forbidden.

Soul on fire, deeply yearning.

Desire inflicts pain, numbness fades away.

Senses are enlightened by a mere thought.

Dreams invaded, unwelcomed awakening.

Dormant, inactive volcano of emotion.

Wall descending and crumbles to the ground.

Protective barricade, infiltrated. The forbidden creeps in.

Dust and debris remain.

Butterflies, I plead with you. Fly far, far away.

End this delusional daydream…

Penelope

 

Renew my mind.

Light up the dark.

Melt the ice around my heart.

Shine bright.

Ignite a spark.

Light a fire.

Burn…

Set my soul a blaze.

I thirst.

I hunger.

Until you’re ALL I crave.

Light of the world…come.

Needing more of you and less of me, today.

Penelope

Thank you for reminding me, that love is patient and it is also kind.

Thanks for showing me that pride is self-seeking and can sometimes, dishonor others.

Thank you for enlightening me, that love rejoices in truth. I should always protect, remain hopeful, and regardless of the circumstance, let love persevere.

Most importantly, thank you for bringing to my attention, God’s love never fails. Even in my weaknesses, I am made strong, through him.

Learning to love, boldly…God’s way.

Penelope

Goodbye feels so final. The closing of one door, to move forward in opening another.

Goodbye leaves behind, precious memories shared. Honest conversations, of two souls that were bared.

Uncommon connection, different, yet the same. Affection that grew deeper, past the ties of just a name.

Heartfelt emotion, both good and bad. The making of a friendship, one that’s real, but also sad.

The status temporary, however, bittersweet. I miss your kind demeanor, and the eloquence of your speech.

You’re buried deep within my heart. I hope you know, I cared. I pray for you daily and the family that you share.

Goodbye is never easy. In fact, I hate the compound word. Instead, I’ll be seeing you, more romantic and less absurd.

Much more appropriate, not just a final act. And, God be willing, the sentiment, an absolute fact.

So, I’ll be seeing you…

You’re in my heart and never forgotten.

Penelope

How can we help the suffering, if we’re unwilling to sit and listen to their stories?

How can we gain trust, if we’re withholding similar pains in which we can relate?

How can we heal the broken-hearted, if we hide the jagged pieces of our own scarred hearts?

We all hurt. We all bleed crimson red.

So, here I am, Lord…send me.

Penelope

Sometimes people let us down, simply by not paying attention…

They haven’t noticed the spring in our step has been reduced to a slow, lingering pace.

They haven’t noticed the missing spark in our eye, which is now a restrained tear, desperately longing to break free.

Most importantly, they haven’t noticed we are lost and struggling to find our way.

People will always let you down. They see what they want to see.

I’m so very thankful for a God who loves me unconditionally. He sees my brokenness and offers healing, while understanding my pain.

No matter how lost I feel, he takes my hand and leads me back to where I need to be.

The struggle is real, but so is God.

Thankful for being a lost and found person. Loved with compassion, saved by grace.

Penelope

There are countless reasons to love September…

Cooler weather fills the air. Leaves tumble gently to the ground. Their colors transposed from the deep greens of summer. Now painted in orange, yellow, red, and brown.

Culinary imaginations, pumpkin spice set ablaze. The replicated fragrance, an intoxicating haze.

Well hello, football. It’s finally here. Anticipation soars. Pass me a beer. Come one, come all. Let the yelping begin. KICK IT…RUN…CATCH IT…WIN! Then next weekend, we’ll do it again.

Let’s not forget the birthdays. We must celebrate. Growing old is a privilege. So bring on the cake!

And lurking around the corner, the holidays set in. Halloween décor, with a little Christmas blend.

September is truly, the southerner’s friend…

Yet, through all the festivities and fun to be had, deep down inside, I’m still quite sad.

September you left me, so many years ago. I stood there sobbing, tears trickling down my nose.

The wicked Cancer, had finally won. I stared down at you, completely numb.

September was the last time, I saw your sweet face. Every year, thereafter,  locked in my mind’s database.

The months speed by. Your birthday in between. Still off in the distance, September can be seen.

September God took you. Now in heaven you wait. Having supper with Jesus, til my soul takes its place.

I love you, dear sister.

I’ll always remember, to keep our love alive, through all the Septembers.

Penelope

She was more than just a sister. She was my greatest friend.

 

I’ll miss her every single day, until we meet again.

Missing my sister terribly,

Penelope

You tell me that you love me, yet you mention her by name. You said she was no good for you, and made you feel great shame. You compare us and dissect us, to see which of us to gain. Meanwhile, I suffer silently, reeling in my pain.

She left you feeling unwanted, took your child and then she was gone. And left you sitting mindlessly, wondering what made things go wrong. Another man in the picture? Your son mentions his presence there. It seems she’s moved on, however briefly, forgetting the vows, which you had shared. 

After little time had passed, you pursued my heart to keep. Soon learning forever after, was a price, to you, too steep. 

Her plan, with her new man, somehow has dwindled and gone astray, now seeing you some what happy, makes her long for the good ole days. 

She misses your devotion and the love you gave her, true. Now suddenly, she realizes, she can’t see you with someone new. Of course, now she has you, I was never yours, from the very start. I was just the rebound girl, who rejuvenated your heart. 

Now you’re just a toy being played, in the wicked witches hands. Today she’ll gladly take you back, til she tires of you again. 

And where does this all leave me? My faith in people shattered, with distrust. Picking up the pieces shamelessly, dusting off my battered heart, with great disgust. 

One day true love will find me, my faith will see me through. God’s love will sustain me and make my heart anew. 

Picking up the pieces, 

Penelope 

I’ve been dreaming of you frequently, can’t keep you in the past. Conversations are their favorite theme, they come and go so fast.

Friendship is the underlining, no dreams of untamed lust. My heart is deeply satisfied, in you it feels great trust. 

Your friendship means the world to me, my dreams, they whisper your name. Our bond uniquely crafted, from our sorrow and our pain.

Unsure of your perception, unsure of many things. One thing I can be sure of, I’ll meet you in my dreams. 

Grateful for your friendship, 

Penelope 

I don’t need your money and I don’t need your physical touch. I don’t need your stern demeanor, or your cold, silent hush. I don’t need your unwanted sarcasm, which cuts me to the bone. I don’t need anything, which makes me feel alone. 

I do need unfailing kindness, which wakes my inner soul. I do need heartfelt compassion, that will last til I am old. I do need arms to hold me, when I’m scared and feel unsure. I do need ample patience, when I am yielding towards the door.

For you see, my heart is fragile. This, I thought you knew. To handle it with caution, be gentle, caring too. 

Penelope